Recently there have been many rape incidents in Pakistan and the numbers are increasing day by day. The most recent incidence of gang-rape of a woman in front of her kids, last week, was most heart-breaking and shameful for me, I felt ashamed being a Pakistani. I remained disturbed for the whole week.

I always find myself, my kids, safe here in the UK. This recent incident in Pakistan made me realise even more that our decision to move to the UK was wise. We have been here since 2014 and during this period I never felt any dirty intentions of any person towards me or my children. People do not Stare at you no matter what you are wearing. It does not matter if you are alone or with someone. Ladies do not need a bodyguard here. I drive a car and many times I drove alone or with my kids at night through bendy dark narrow roads, tall bushes on both sides but I felt secure. It never happened to me that I would get robbed or anything worse than that. A lot of driving instructors are male, ladies take lessons alone but never any bad or immoral incidence is to be heard.

In Pakistan, if a female buys sanitary pads, the shopkeeper wraps it in a piece of paper and then puts it in a black bag, as it is some kind of immorality but they never practise the true morality. While in the UK any woman can buy sanitary pads without hiding it and no one would stare, and it’s my personal experience.

When I did not have a satellite navigation system in my car, many times I stopped the car and asked guidance from some passerby about the way to go but I never felt scared or experienced any harassment. I always received guidance with a delightful smile and respect. I came across recent incidents in the modern city of Islamabad Pakistan where female drivers were harassed by motorbikers and other male drivers.

I live in a small town in East Sussex county of UK and there are many trails in woods for the people who love to walk on tracks. These tracks are mostly in quiet, calm and less populated areas. I many times walked either alone or sometimes with my daughter but these are always safe. There is a sense of security wherever you go, some bad incidents happen but they are rare and also dealt with full force by law. That is how crimes against women are discouraged here.

I lived in the hospital accommodation and sometimes workers used to visit for repair work and general maintenance, mostly I used to be alone at home as kids were in school and husband on his job. I never felt scared or noticed any immoral intentions of those men, they have a very professional attitude. Although they were men and know very well that most of the ladies in the flats were alone at that time of the day. Same was the case with the gardener, the meter reader, window cleaners, all of them were men but they had the moral values that made them more respectful in one’s eyes. It always gave a sense of security in every way.

Why are ladies, kids and the weak not safe in Pakistan? Why these rape cases are increasing in numbers day by day. We know that only a few cases are reported while most of the people choose to remain silent to save their respect. There is a national attitude of men which has developed over decades where females are considered as a commodity which can be abused wherever possible. It is not just illiteracy which is in the root of this issue as we see educated people in big offices sexually harass working females. Women who have to visit offices, who travel by public transport, who live alone, all face these heinous attitudes.

As far as my self and my children are concerned I would choose the right place for ourselves to live where we feel safe & secure. By the way, it is not our country fellows in Pakistan who have given the bad name to Pakistan but it is in the UK as well, where Pakistani men became notorious in area of Rochdale for grooming young girls and then raping them. Now sometimes when people ask my nationality, to be honest, I feel ashamed because of such news about Pakistanis. My heart has become so sad that I am getting disappointed day by day. I have started disowning my country because of a sense of shame. Now the UK is my country where me, my husband and especially my kids we all are safe and away from hunting eyes. I should say that the UK is heaven on earth for me. Love the UK

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